The Fortune (1975)

Columbia Pictures
Directed by Mike Nichols
My rating: 2.5 stars out of 4
IMDb
(Sony Movie Channel)

Warren Beatty and Jack Nicholson team-up to break the "Mann Act", a forgotten law from the 1920s which prohibits transporting an unmarried woman across state lines for "immoral" purposes. Warren, already married, convinces Jack to marry his girlfriend Stockard Channing, even though he is the one she is in love with, then they all move-in together in an LA apartment. What they really want is Stockard's money, who stands to inherit a fortune, so they plan to murder her and try to make it look like suicide. However, she is saved by their complete ineptitude. Jack gets the best scenes, but it's hard to shake the feeling you are watching a comedic version of his character from The Shining. Scatman Crothers even shows up to give it a feeling of deja vu.

Derby (1971)

Cinerama Releasing
Directed by Robert Kaylor
My rating: 2 stars out of 4
IMDb
(DVD, Code Red)

Documentary about the life of a lower middle-class worker in a Dayton, Ohio, tire factory who dreams of leaving his job to become a roller derby star. This guy is a real winner: he wears sunglasses all the time, he cheats on his wife and brags about it on film, he skips work and lies about it, etc. His friends are not much better, mostly white trash who use pornography for wallpaper. And roller derby? A "sport" in which people watch solely for the numerous fights. Then-daring documentary approach to its subject saturates reality television today.

Raw Edge (1956)

Universal-International Pictures
Directed by John Sherwood
My rating: 2 stars out of 4
IMDb
(Encore)

A rancher-tyrant in lawless Oregon declares that a woman belongs to the first man to claim her, regardless of circumstances. He hangs an innocent man accused of attacking his own wife. The man's brother, Rory Calhoun, shows up and vows to get revenge. The "first man to claim her" law backfires, since it makes every husband the target of lonely lumberjacks and trappers everywhere, including the tyrant who declared it law. This leads to numerous brawls, including Calhoun who gets involved in quite a few himself, especially when he falls in love with the rancher's wife.

Lunacy (2005)

Zeitgeist Films
Directed by Jan Svankmajer
My rating: 3 stars out of 4
IMDb
(DVD, Zeitgeist Films)

The Marquis De Sade (Jan Triska, in a virtuoso performance) kidnaps a patient in an insane asylum (Pavel Liska) for his own amusement and pleasure. In the film's best scene, the poor fellow witnesses a heretical mass in which the Marquis explains his philosophy by railing against Nature, God and religion. He takes Liska to another asylum in which patients get therapy by exercising their free will, in other words acting out all of their perversions. The Marquis, who runs the place, does much of the same. Liska falls in love with another patient, the beautiful Anna Geislerova, but she may be using him for her own pleasure as well. It leads to a shaky ending, implying it was all just a bad dream. Svankmajer's filmed introduction sounds more like an apology, and the connecting stop-motion animated segments of tongues and other body parts is distracting, since everything in between is good enough to stand on its own. 

Girls on the Road (1972)

Fanfare Films
Directed by Thomas J. Schmidt
My rating: 1.5 stars out of 4
IMDb
(DVD, Scorpion Releasing)

Two teenage girls recently graduated from high school cruise the southern California beaches. After passing up hippies and other assorted undesirables, they pick up a clean-cut hitchhiker in a military uniform. He turns out to be a closet psychopath experiencing Vietnam flashbacks. He takes them to his friends at an "encounter group", where even stranger people hang out. There is a murderer among them, and it is pretty easy to figure out which one by the time you make it to the abrupt ending.

Rails Into Laramie (1954)

Universal-International Pictures
Directed by Jesse Hibbs
My rating: 2 stars out of 4
IMDb
(Encore)

Rowdy Cavalry officer John Payne is sent to Laramie to single-handedly clean up the town. Railroad workers are lounging on the job, preferring to drink and gamble in the profitable saloons owned by baddie Dan Duryea. Although Payne and Duryea are old friends, it doesn't stop them from a ruthless battle for control of the railroaders. Unfortunately their characters are little more than stereotypes, particularly Duryea who just doesn't convince. There are a few locomotives on display, but other than one rooftop fight towards the end, they are mostly in the background.

The Law (1959)

Les Films Corona (France)
Directed by Jules Dassin
My rating: 2.5 stars out of 4
IMDb
(DVD, Oscilloscope Laboratories)

Sex, money and power in a southern Italian town is the theme of this French film. Gina Lollobrigida is at the center of it all. She is the lover of a wealthy, aging artist who tells the other important people in town what to do, including the police. She falls for visiting agronomist Marcello Mastroianni, who struggles to make sense of the strange customs. For example, the men of the town play a drinking game to determine who will be the "boss", the losers have to get permission from him to drink the local wine. One day Gina steals the wallet of a visiting Swiss tourist. The police are on to her so she must appeal to the dying artist for help. Meanwhile, the police chief's son is involved in a love affair with an important judge. Dassin directs this complex melodrama with a master's touch, but the material is not quite up to his talents.

This Savage Land (1969)

Universal Pictures
Directed by Vincent McEveety
My rating: 2.5 stars out of 4
IMDb
(Encore)

Feature film edited together from episodes of the TV series "The Road West" is enlivened by a great cast and some fine acting. The story is familiar: homesteaders in Kansas try to start a new life while a gang of Rebel outlaws threatens the peace. George C. Scott adds stature to the proceedings as the leader of the gang: a political idealist from the South who gradually begins to see the error of his ways. John Drew Barrymore gives a typically intense performance as a Rebel with a taste for blood in one of his last roles. The women in the cast are quite believable as well: Kathryn Hays as a strong-willed doctor's daughter and Brenda Scott as a jealous daughter. And that's Kelly Corcoran as the young kid, brother of the more famous Disney star Kevin Corcoran. It all takes place on the overly-familiar Universal back lot standing in for Kansas.

Enter the Void (2009)

IFC Films
Directed by Gaspar Noe
My rating: 2 stars out of 4
IMDb
(Blu-ray, IFC Films)

Gaspar Noe's intriguing concept of a death experience filmed entirely from a point-of-view perspective is wasted on the life of a selfish, boring drug dealer. "Oscar" is our hero, an American who lives in a grungy, one-room apartment above the glittering neon streets of downtown Tokyo. He deals drugs in the strip clubs and bars, eventually getting enough money to bring his sister to town. She gets a job as a stripper and soon gets hooked on drugs as well. Oscar is killed one night when he is set up by a friend for the police. He relives his life in a long flashback, in which we see how the death of his parents in a car accident shapes it. The narrative finally reaches the night of his death (again). He then watches from above as a sort of omnipotent presence while the lives of his sister and his friends play out after his death, until he is finally reincarnated as his own brother in one of the more preposterous endings to a film you will ever see. Filled with pornographic imagery, wallowing in the filth of the worst side of a big city, there are no insights into the after life here, it's just an excuse for flying cameras, overhead shots and handheld shaky cam work. Compare it to Darren Aronofsky's The Fountain, which has a similar idea, only it is not afraid to explore the religious themes only hinted at by Enter the Void in token references to the Tibetan Book of the Dead. Unfortunately, neither film is very good.

The Tender Trap (1955)

MGM
Directed by Charles Walters
My rating: 2 stars out of 4
IMDb
(DVD, Warner Bros.)

Frank Sinatra is a talent agent in NYC living like a playboy in his bachelor pad. Pal David Wayne shows up from his small hometown contemplating divorce, amazed at the parade of women in his friend's selfish lifestyle. Debbie Reynolds is an old-fashioned girl who auditions for one of Frank's shows and he can't resist making advances, even when she makes it clear she is only interested in marriage. Franks wants it both ways, so he hides his real life from Debbie while seducing her on her couch. He gives in to her demands and they get engaged, but he also proposes to one of his regular girls. Don't worry, there is the tacked-on happy ending. Preposterous story is based on a popular Broadway play and feels like it: flat direction that rarely leaves the apartment gives it a stage-bound, claustrophobic feel. Sexist attitudes that may have been the norm in 1955 will offend most today.

If He Hollers, Let Him Go! (1968)

Cinerama Releasing
Directed by Charles Martin
My rating: 2 stars out of 4
IMDb
(DVD, Code Red)

Black intellectual and artist Raymond St. Jacques is framed for murder in the racist south. He escapes from prison and is picked up by a wealthy white man (Kevin McCarthy) who brings him to his mansion. McCarthy tries to force him to kill his wife, but St. Jacques manages to get away. On the run again, he has numerous flashbacks to his arrest, trial and relationship with nightclub singer Barbara McNair. He finds the man responsible for the murder and tries to prove his innocence. Very similar to the previous year's In the Heat of the Night, but Raymond St. Jacques is no Sidney Poitier.

Down to Earth (1932)

Fox Film
Directed by David Butler
My rating: 1.5 stars out of 4
IMDb
(Fox Movie Channel)

Fish-out-of-water story with folk hero Will Rogers the unlikely head of a nouveau riche Oklahoma family threatened with bankruptcy in the Great Depression. Rogers bickers with his butler, chastises his wife and kids for their elaborate spending, then heads to Chicago to find a way to finance it all. He brings back a broke Russian prince and throws a party in one last attempt to salvage the family finances. Excruciatingly slow and unfunny, peppered with eye-rolling dialogue like "don't cry over spilled milk".

Alice's Restaurant (1969)

United Artists
Directed by Arthur Penn
My rating: 3 stars out of 4
IMDb
(DVD, MGM)

Arlo Guthrie stars basically as himself in this movie based on his song about a restaurant. He goes to college to avoid the draft but drops out when he doesn't fit in with the conservative Montana community. He ends up at a commune living in a converted church in Massachusetts. He hangs out with his friends, including Alice and her restaurant, until he gets arrested for illegal trash dumping. However, it saves him from the draft, again. Although Arlo is the undeniable star of the film, its heart is really the relationship between Alice and her husband Ray, and it is not pretty. Alice has an affair with Arlo's recovering drug addict friend, and later shows up at his New York apartment when she leaves him. Although not spoken, there is implied spousal abuse happening here. They reconcile and get "remarried" in the big finale at the commune. However, the final image of Alice alone in front of the church as the guests leave does not forebode well for their future.

Golden Girl (1951)

Twentieth Century-Fox Film
Directed by Lloyd Bacon
My rating: 2.5 stars out of 4
IMDb
(Fox Movie Channel)

A spunky 20-year-old Mitzi Gaynor plays a stagestruck country girl who goes gaga over saloon hall singer Lola Montez. When her father loses the family boarding house gambling, they hit the road intent on making Mitzi a star. She falls in love with southern rascal Dale Robertson, who may or may not be using her for his own gambling aspirations. The Civil War intrudes on the festivities breaking up their budding romance. Occasionally diverting Americana spiced up by the music of Lionel Newman and company make for an enjoyable, if predictable, Technicolor musical.

Cole Younger, Gunfighter (1958)

Allied Artists
Directed by R.G. Springsteen
My rating: 2 stars out of 4
IMDb
(Turner Classic Movies)

The Texas state police, known as "bluebellies", intimidate two innocent young ranchers to the point of murder. Forced to go on the lam, they meet up with none other than Cole Younger, gunfighter. Younger takes one of them under his wing and teaches him how to defend himself with honor. Meanwhile, the other one goes back home and romances his friend's girl, then frames him for murder. It all ends up in a courtroom trial where Younger is the surprise witness. Not bad, really, as long as you can accept Cole Younger as a loner outlaw with a heart of gold.

Quantrill's Raiders (1958)

Allied Artists
Directed by Edward Bernds
My rating: 2 stars out of 4
IMDb
(Turner Classic Movies)

Steve Cochran is a Captain in the Confederate Army sent to Kansas with orders for a group of rag-tag guerrillas to attack a Union outpost. Cochran romances a local boardinghouse owner and befriends her son, but sneaks off to help his Rebel friends at all hours. In one scene, he threatens to slit the young boy's throat to get out of jail, but later they both seem to act as if it never happened. Cochran's poorly defined character is the main problem with the film, his Jekyll and Hyde personality leaves no one to root for. The CinemaScope presentation is wasted on the rocky landscape of southern California, a poor substitute for eastern Kansas.

Apache Territory (1958)

Columbia Pictures
Directed by Ray Nazarro
My rating: 1.5 stars out of 4
IMDb
(Turner Classic Movies)

Loner Rory Calhoun single-handedly tries to save an orphaned girl, a wounded teenager, a renegade Indian and an entire company of the Cavalry from the savage Apaches. They barricade themselves at a water hole and play a waiting game with the Indians. There is plenty of time for romance, bickering and cliched dialogue.

Changes (1969)

Cinerama Releasing
Directed by Hall Bartlett
My rating: 3 stars out of 4
IMDb
(DVD, Code Red)

Introspective film of disaffected college youth in southern California in the late 60s. Kent Lane is rebelling against his parents, against society and against himself. He drifts from one girl to another, experiments with drugs and takes odd jobs. He finally ends up with Michele Carey and it seems they might have something special. However, his lack of direction eventually gets the best of them. It's very much a product of its time, with a soundtrack featuring Judy Collins' hit song "Both Sides, Now" and haunting singer-songwriter works by Tim Buckley. Somehow Code Red managed to keep the original soundtrack intact, something the major studios too often fail to do.

Close Encounters of the Third Kind (1977)

Columbia Pictures
Directed by Steven Spielberg
My rating: 4 stars out of 4
IMDb
(Blu-ray, Sony)

It might not be Spielberg's most mature work, but it might be his most cinematic, and more importantly his most entertaining. Richard Dreyfuss is sent to investigate a massive power outage in Indiana, but instead has an encounter with UFOs. His life is turned upside down when he becomes obsessed with a shape he cannot quite comprehend. It turns out to be an invitation to another encounter with the aliens in Wyoming, this time up close and personal. There are a number of classic scenes: the abduction of the boy Barry is one of the most effective horror scenes ever, Dreyfuss' encounter in the pick up truck, the sculpture in his living room, the whole sequence in Wyoming is awe-inspiring, especially when the size of the mother ship is realized. I strongly prefer the original theatrical cut, the later cuts add little to the film, and perhaps a little too much.

The Pirates! Band of Misfits (2012)

Columbia Pictures
Directed by Peter Lord
My rating: 2.5 stars out of 4
IMDb
(Blu-ray 3D, Sony)

Computer animation is used to simulate stop-motion animation, in 3-D naturally, with less than optimal results. It lacks the warmth and artistic nuances of real stop-motion. Anyway, it's a fairly predictable modern story of a pirate who wants desperately to be "pirate of the year". He fails to get it the usual way, by robbing ships, but when Charles Darwin informs him that his pet parrot is actually a rare dodo bird, they set off to London in the hopes of winning gold in another contest, this one for scientists. It all happens at a breakneck pace with a bombastic musical score, subtle it is not. Still, the recreation of Victorian London is appealing and there are enough brief asides addressed to the adults in the audience to keep it interesting.

It Shouldn't Happen to a Dog (1946)

Twentieth Century-Fox Film
Directed by Herbert Leeds
My rating: 2 stars out of 4
IMDb
(Fox Movie Channel)

Intrepid newspaper reporter Allyn Joslyn falls for an April Fool's joke in which a dog holds up a bar. It makes front page headlines, so he steals the dog and tries to prove it really did happen to save his job. He gets mixed up with the dog's owner, a policewoman who is after real crooks. Breezy, post-war comedy is never really funny and will offend modern politically correct sensibilities, especially on the role of women.

Apache War Smoke (1952)

MGM
Directed by Harold F. Kress
My rating: 2 stars out of 4
IMDb
(Turner Classic Movies)

Passengers on a stagecoach take refuge in an army fort when they spot Indian war smoke. Some take the opportunity for romance, others have their eyes on the strong box full of gold. Gilbert Roland does both, as a playboy-bandit who romances every girl in the cast. More melodrama than action, including a subplot the posits Roland as the father of a stagecoach owner nearly his same age. Ah chihuahua, indeed.

Wholly Moses! (1980)

Columbia Pictures
Directed by Gary Weis
My rating: 1.5 stars out of 4
IMDb
(Sony Movie Channel)

Dreadful Biblical satire is never funny, which is quite an accomplishment given the wealth of material. Dudley Moore overhears God talking to Moses and thinks he is the "chosen one" to lead the slaves out of Egypt. He wanders around the Holy Land in a series of unconnected vignettes. There are many cameos which add very little to the proceedings, even Richard Pryor as a jive talking pharaoh seems forced. The lovely and talented Laraine Newman is wasted as Moore's love interest.

Tender Is the Night (1962)

Twentieth Century-Fox Film
Directed by Henry King
My rating: 2.5 stars out of 4
IMDb
(Fox Movie Channel)

Brooding melodrama of the wealthy elite set in exotic European locations. Jason Robards is a successful psychiatrist married to Jennifer Jones, a former patient. In a long flashback, the story is told of her treatment and his unsuccessful attempts to resist her advances. They embark on a honeymoon to the Riviera which never seems to end. He flirts with a beautiful movie star, sending his wife into a tailspin. She recovers, only to have him fall into an alcoholism that takes up the final third of the film. The location photography in Zurich and the Riviera is alluring, and the performances by both Jones and Robards are fine, but that final act really just weighs the whole thing down.

The Foxes of Harrow (1947)

Twentieth Century-Fox Film
Directed by John M. Stahl
My rating: 2 stars out of 4
IMDb
(Fox Movie Channel)

Relentlessly bleak melodrama about an Irish gambler and his trophy wife, a New Orleans debutant. Rex Harrison wins a fortune and a plantation at the card table soon after his arrival in Louisiana. He falls in love with the beautiful Maureen O'Hara at first sight, but she has better sense and manages to avoid his advances, at least for awhile. He builds a mansion and invites her to host a party, during which she consents to marriage. On their honeymoon, he gets drunk downstairs with the boys while she waits alone in bed, but he breaks down the bedroom door in a drunken rage. Years of misery follow, including a child with a limp, both of them trying to raise it in their own way. Tragedy follows tragedy, until even the voodoo practiced by their slaves is a welcome respite. A hopeful ending rings hollow after nearly two hours.

Column South (1953)

Universal-International Pictures
Directed by Frederick De Cordova
My rating: 2 stars out of 4
IMDb
(Encore)

A cavalry outpost on the western frontier during the early days of the Civil War is the setting for this Audie Murphy oater. He butts heads with the new fort commander from Mississippi who doesn't understand the local Indians. Their regional commander, a southern sympathizer, hatches a plan to divert the company by stirring up Indian trouble, then send them south to fight in the war. Murphy discovers the plan, but not before it leads to strife among the men and with the Indians. Curiously, the southerners are allowed to join the Confederate army unimpeded in the end.

The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo (2011)

Columbia Pictures
Directed by David Fincher
My rating: 1.5 stars out of 4
IMDb
(Starz)

Another disappointing Fincher opus that is basically an NCIS-style investigation incorporating elements of torture porn. Daniel Craig is hired by a wealthy Swedish businessman to investigate the disappearance of his sister in the 1960s. Craig moves into a cottage next to his mansion on an isolated Swedish island in the dead of winter. He digs through newspaper articles, photographs and business records in his search for the missing girl. He hires Rooney Mara,  an anti-social punk/hacker, to help. Her backstory includes disgusting scenes of rape and torture, completely unnecessary to the plot. The two of them follow up more impossible clues, ultimately leading to a serial killer with a Nazi past. A tacked on ending has Mara stealing billions from the company, but being rejected by her lover. Perhaps if the film had been edited down by an hour or more, mostly of the gratuitous scenes of sex and violence, including the brutal slaying of a cat, it would have been tolerable, but as it stands it is practically unwatchable.

The Savage Guns (1961)

MGM
Directed by Michael Carreras
My rating: 2.5 stars out of 4
IMDb
(Turner Classic Movies)

Richard Basehart is a loner gunslinger traveling through Mexico. After losing his horse, he confronts but eventually befriends ranch owner Don Taylor, who has put down his guns for good. They tangle with a land-hungry tyrant and his gang who wants Taylor's ranch. The overly-familiar story and romantic subplots are somewhat predictable, but the widescreen photography in a harsh Spanish landscape almost redeems it.

The Challenge (1970)

Twentieth Century-Fox Film
Directed by George McCowan (as Alan Smithee)
My rating: 2 stars out of 4
IMDb
(Fox Movie Channel)

Darren McGavin is cigar chomping mercenary-for-hire picked to represent the US in a "surrogate" war with a small Asian country. At stake is a downed satellite with technology that could put nuclear warheads in space. The plot is familiar: McGavin is chosen, trained and finally sent to an uninhabited island where the "war" takes place with character actor Mako. They search for fresh water and lay booby traps, but neither is killed after five days. The Army steps in and sends help, which is against the rules, so the two combatants solve things their own way. McGavin is miscast as the macho military type, and it suffers from a small TV movie budget, but there are some interesting ideas floating around.

Yesterday's Enemy (1959)

Columbia Pictures
Directed by Val Guest
My rating: 2.5 stars out of 4
IMDb
(Turner Classic Movies)

Stanley Baker is the commander of a British patrol in a Burmese jungle. They take refuge in a native camp after a skirmish with Japanese soldiers. They find an important map and attempt to get the information to headquarters. Baker executes some natives to coerce a prisoner, leading to debate among his men on the ethics of war. When they are discovered and taken prisoners themselves by a Japanese patrol, the tables are turned. Despite a good screenplay by Peter Newman, it's somewhat of a missed opportunity due mainly to the flat direction by Guest.

Ten Seconds to Hell (1959)

United Artists
Directed by Robert Aldrich
My rating: 2.5 stars out of 4
IMDb
(Turner Classic Movies)

Six men, all former German soldiers, take a job defusing bombs in the crumbled remains of Berlin. They make a bet that they can last 3 months without getting killed, but it is easy to guess that it will come down to the last two. Jack Palance and Jeff Chandler are at ideological, and personal, odds with each other. One is a selfish bore, the other an idealist who would risk his life to save the other men. A large British bomb, with a tricky defusing, will test their commitment to those ideals. At its best in the bomb scenes, but the romantic melodrama with a French girl is tiresome and the occasional narration unnecessary.

The Camp on Blood Island (1958)

Columbia Pictures
Directed by  Val Guest
My rating: 2 stars out of 4
IMDb
(Turner Classic Movies)

British prisoners of war suffer executions and worse at the hands of the camp's inhumane Japanese commander. He promises a massacre if the Japanese lose the war, and when the prisoners learn that is exactly what has happened they try to keep the news from him. An American pilot crash lands on the island and threatens to spoil their plans. It's not quite the exploitation flick implied by the title, but not a serious war film either, with too much emphasis on the torture and executions and not enough on the characters.

The Return of the Whistler (1948)

Columbia Pictures
Directed by D. Ross Lederman
My rating: 2.5 stars out of 4
IMDb
(Turner Classic Movies)

Last but best in the Whistler series and the only one without Richard Dix. Instead Michael Duane stars as lovestruck fellow trying to marry his mysterious French girlfriend after the war. They end up at a remote Justice of the Peace on a rainy night but have to spend the night in a motel until he returns. His girl goes missing while down the street at a garage and he must unravel the mystery of her disappearance. The trail leads to an inheritance, switched identities and a sanitarium in the city.

Pussycat, Pussycat, I Love You (1970)

United Artists
Directed by  Rod Amateau
My rating: 2 stars out of 4
IMDb
(DVD, MGM Limited Edition Collection)

Italian sex comedy is mostly a series of unfunny situations with married Ian McShane hopping from one bed to another and his lonely wife doing much of the same. It gets slightly more interesting towards the end with the arrival of John Gavin as Hollywood movie star Grant Granite. The comedy veers towards satirical slapstick that takes place on the sets of the Cinecitta studios in Rome. The cast tears through a spaghetti western on stagecoach for the finale.

Riot on Sunset Strip (1967)

American International Pictures
Directed by Arthur Dreifuss
My rating: 2 stars out of 4
IMDb
(DVD, MGM Limited Edition Collection)

Hollywood "long hairs" congregate on the Sunset Strip much to the chagrin of local businesses. They go to Pandora's Box and dance to The Standells and The Chocolate Watch Band who perform several songs. Innocent teen Mimsy Farmer is invited to a "freak out" party where she is slipped some LSD in her diet drink and gang raped upstairs. Her free-form dance after taking the drug is an all-time camp classic. Aldo Ray is her estranged father and head of the police department. Their reconcilement leads to many melodramatic moments. The "riot" in the title never happens.

This Is Cinerama (1952)

Cinerama Releasing
Directed by Merian C. Cooper, et al
My rating: 3 stars out of 4
IMDb
(Blu-ray, Flicker Alley)

This superb release from Flicker Alley recreates the original Cinerama experience in loving detail.The film starts by projecting the image on long, flowing blue curtains, just like in the theater, which then slide open (you can even hear them moving) to just the right width for the introductory prologue with Lowell Thomas in full frame and black and white. He gives a brief history of the movies and then utters his famous phrase: "Ladies and gentlemen, this is Cinerama!" The curtains fully open to reveal the super-wide curved screen, simulated here with a "smilebox" shaped picture instead of the usual rectangle. The opening rollercoaster ride has got to be the most thrilling 5-minutes in motion picture history, an opening ride from which the rest of the film never quite recovers. Make no mistake, there are some spectacular moments: the opera house in Milan, the boat ride through Venice, flying scenes over Niagara Falls, the Grand Canyon and Zion National Park. However, much of the second act seems superfluous, particularly an over-long stay at Cypress Gardens in Florida with water skiing beauties. Nonetheless, it's not to be missed and is the instant go-to disc for showing off your home theater.

The Eyes of Annie Jones (1964)

Twentieth Century-Fox Film
Directed by Reginald Le Borg
My rating: 2 stars out of 4
IMDb
(Fox Movie Channel)

Richard Conte plays a wealthy businessman and playboy in England who hires a hit man to murder his sister so he can inherit her factory. Concerned relatives of the missing girl consult a psychic teenager at the local orphanage to help find her. The teen develops a crush on Conte, which is a bit of a stretch given their age differences and the fact that he is such a heel. His scheme eventually unwinds not because of the girl but because the nervous hit man gives himself away. The unlikeable characters, unimaginative plot, teen romantic and psychic melodrama all add up to little more than a passing diversion.

Tsotsi (2005)

Miramax Films
Directed by Gavin Hood
My rating: 3 stars out of 4
IMDb
(Starz)

Teenage street thug in Johannesburg gets involved in murder, beatings, grand theft auto and finally kidnapping when he finds a baby in the back seat of his stolen car. He decides to bring it home to his shack and take care of it, but is totally unprepared. He sees a young mother and baby, follows them home and forces her to breast feed his baby at gunpoint. He wisely chooses to leave it with her while he tries to straighten things out with his gangster buddies. His interactions with the baby and its foster mother begin to soften his tough street persona leading to his ultimate redemption when he returns it to the real mother. Complex and real characters combined with an unpredictable plot raise this above the stereotypical "slum" movie.

In Darkness (2011)

Sony Pictures Classics
Directed by Agnieszka Holland
My rating: 2.5 stars out of 4
IMDb
(Starz)

Long, brooding account of a group of Jews forced to hideout in the sewers of a Polish city when the Germans "cleanse" the ghetto. A Polish sewer worker seizes the opportunity to make a load of cash by bringing them food and keeping them safe. Eventually he comes to see their humanity and even like them, and his transformation is the best part of the film. However, it is marred by explicit sex scenes tangential to the plot,  graphic violence and too much shaky cam work, all an attempt to give it a modern "edge" but instead almost ruining an otherwise excellent film.

Paprika (2006)

Sony Pictures Classics
Directed by Satoshi Kon
My rating: 1.5 stars out of 4
IMDb
(Starz)

Dreams and reality merge into an incoherent mess in this Japanese anime. A device that allows people to record, analyze and ultimately enter dreams is stolen from a manufacturer. The people responsible try to get it back before giant screaming dolls take over the world. Their savior is a naked cute teen who inhales the bad guy. It's all set to throbbing, auto-tuned techno music.

The Black Dakotas (1954)

Columbia Pictures
Directed by Ray Nazarro
My rating: 2 stars out of 4
IMDb
(Encore)

Southern sympathizers in the Dakotas stir up Indian trouble in an attempt to divert northern troops from the war in the south. One of them murders and assumes the identity of a government man on a peace mission for Lincoln. The make wild promises to the Sioux with no intentions of keeping them, hoping to start a massacre. A local girl, the daughter of one of the rebels, and a friend try to stop them. Passable, if predictable, western shot on familiar Columbia ranch locations in California.

Delicatessen (1991)

Miramax Films
Directed by Marc Caro and Jean-Pierre Jeunet
My rating: 2.5 stars out of 4
IMDb
(Starz)

A former clown takes a job as a handyman in a French residential building full of quirky characters. The owner of the building is a butcher who uses the handyman ad as bait for victims, who are promptly murdered and served up as dinner in a post-apocalyptic society where meat is scarce. The clown falls in love with his daughter who lives upstairs putting a kink in his plans. Other characters indulge in their eccentricities, which is mainly what this movie is about: quirky, quirky, quirky. It owes more than a little to the much superior Brazil.

The Secret of the Whistler (1946)

Columbia Pictures
Directed by George Sherman
My rating: 2 stars out of 4
IMDb
(Turner Classic Movies)

Richard Dix is back in another entry of the Whistler series. This time he is a modern artist living off the wealth of his wife. When she has a heart attack and is given weeks to live, he begins romancing pretty model Leslie Brooks. However, when his wife gets well he resorts to murder. He marries the girlfriend but months later she begins to suspect him. It feels more like a TV episode than a movie, and the explanation for a vital page from a diary for the ending did not make sense.